The obstacles of your past can become the
gateways that lead to new beginnings.
In order to live a fuller and more complete life, you we must learn how to let go of past failures and disappointments and not carry them with you into your future. Hanging on to the pain, bitterness or disappointment from a past conflict is a very heavy burden to carry around. It affects your moods, attitudes, relationships, job and every other aspect of your life. Negativity will eat away at your self-esteem and destroy any possibility of a life free from pain.
But there is light at the end of the tunnel! Your future does not have to be a repeat of your past. You don’t need to resign yourself to a life of pain, no matter what you have already been through. You can lay down your burdens. It really is okay for you to be free. In fact, you deserve it!
Here are five steps to help you move forward and find the freedom you need:
1. Talk it out. Discuss your past pain, fear, disappointment or trauma with a trusted friend or family member. Fully express the feelings that you have associated with the situation. Cry, scream, or do whatever you need to do to release the bottled up emotions in a safe way.
Until you really talk about the feelings connected to your past, you may not be able to move past them. Once you have spoken the words, release them from your mind forever. As hard as that may sound, it is the only way to free yourself from your past.
2. Journal. Writing in your journal is an excellent way to pour out a lot of your pain. A journal offers the safety of knowing your words are just for you, and they won’t be read by anyone else, unless you choose otherwise. Don’t get hung up on the spelling, grammar, or even if the words follow a logical progression, simply write from your heart.
Physically writing your thoughts and feelings can release your emotions so you can move past them.
3. Forgive. People often misunderstand the meaning of forgiveness. Forgiveness does not mean that what happened to you is unimportant or even that you are saying it’s “okay.” In fact, forgiveness isn’t really about the other person at all.
Forgiveness simply means that you have made the conscious choice to let go of the desire to exact revenge and punishment, and you have found a satisfactory measure of closure within your heart and soul. Forgiveness releases you from the burden of carrying the pain any longer. By choosing to forgive, you can stop thinking about the past so that it won’t control your present and your future.
4. Get help. You can choose to get help from a life coach or a therapist. The people closest to you may not always the best choice to help you work through your pain. It may prove difficult to fully open up about your deepest pain or it may be hard for them to step back far enough to help you through it.
Seeking professional guidance can give you the safety of relative anonymity, which can sometimes make it easier to share your problems. Often a coach or counselor can help you us see a new point of view, which can help you move forward.
Hanging onto past negativity isn’t necessary. No matter what your history holds, you can learn to release it and move forward into a life filled with more contentment and greater joy. Find a method that works well for you and begin, today, to let go of the past and move into the life you want, are seeking and deserve!
Thoughts?
Photo Credit: sara biljana via Compfight cc
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