Martina McGowan MD – Page 12 – life lived by the Book

How to Get Through Feeling Burned Out

burnout

Burnout is nature’s way of telling you,

you’ve been going through the motions

your soul has departed;

you’re a zombie,

a member of the walking dead,

a sleepwalker.

False optimism is like administrating stimulants

to an exhausted nervous system.

Sam Keen

Have you been feeling like you may be suffering from burnout? Whether it has been caused by work issues, stress at home, relationship challenges, or a combination of all them, it can give you a frightening feeling of hopelessness! Burnout often causes feelings of numbness and a sense of lost-ness in not knowing how to get your life headed back in the right direction. But, hope is not lost! There are a few strategies you can utilize to help you relieve some of the symptoms that come with the feeling of being burned out.

1. Don’t place all of the blame on yourself. Life is hectic and stressful. It is full of intense demands placed on your shoulders every day. If you are feeling burnt out, rather than blaming yourself, choose to be proactive in getting back in the proverbial saddle so that you can feel like yourself again.

Always remember, that you are the one in control of your destiny. Focus on what you can do, and less on what you think you should do.

2. Lighten up! Stop being so serious all the time. With the stress and responsibilities that you carry around on a daily basis, you may be in need of some plain old silliness. Make time to release some of your inhibitions and have some fun!

Whether it is dancing in your living room or swinging on the swings at a local park, take some time to connect with your inner child again. This will help you let go of your current stress level, and that is important, even if it is just for a little while.

Making time to have some fun will give you a chance to refocus your mind and energies and get your life and priorities back to where you feel they need to be.

3. Watch your health. It is important to stay in peak physical condition when you are constantly under stress. Eat several servings of fruits and vegetables, drink large amounts of water, and of course, get some exercise.

Be sure to fit exercise into your busy schedule by making an appointment with yourself to do it, and then keep your appointment! It doesn’t have to be two hours at the gym. Start with small time increments and a simple do-able exercise, like going outside for a ten minute walking break. Then build up.

4. Stop the time leaks. Look at ways that you can improve your time management skills. You may be burnt out because you are trying to fit a week’s worth of stuff into a single day. Unfortunately, that is not possible! Learning how to budget the time in your day more effectively will relieve a lot of the time-related pressure and stress.

Better time management will lessen the feeling of being overwhelmed, as well as enable you to have the time you need to do the things you want to do.

5. Rest. Get enough sleep. This will allow your body time to rest, rejuvenate, and start the upcoming day with more energy. You can also deal with stressful situations better when you are fully alert and focused. When you get enough rest, you will find yourself more focused, levelheaded, and patient.

No matter how you may try to dress it up, modern life is not simple or easy. So there is little wonder that sometimes you will feel like you just cannot juggle everything any more! And, although these feelings are completely normal from time to time, left unchecked, they can get out of control. Before you reach that point, it is important to get your life headed back in the right direction, the direction of your choosing. These burnout tips will help you better handle every-day stresses so that you can enjoy all the amazing gifts life has to offer you!

Thoughts?

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How to break up with your bad habits

habit

Chains of habit are too light to be felt until

they are too heavy to be broken.

Warren Buffett

Do you feel that some of your habits are holding you back from experiencing the successful life you desire? Your habit may be as small as biting your nails or buying expensive lattes every single day. At the other end of the spectrum, you may want to break free of smoking, extreme anger, excessive eating, or some other detrimental habits. Here are a few tips that can help you put an end to those pesky practice once and for all.

1. Find your “why.” Determine why you should stop. Think about how your may be hurting you and/ or others. Is it detrimental to your health? Screwing up your appearance? Putting a dent in your wallet? Does it make you act irrationally? Does it hurt your loved ones? Sit down and make a list of the benefits that you will experience when you do put an end to this habit once and for all.

If you can find no compelling reason to stop, then the chances are high that you will be less willing to work toward quitting. Find a reason to stop the progression of your habit and hammer that thought into your mind each time you feel compelled to continue with it.

2. Get a carrot. Of course, when there is a direct reward at the end of your journey, you will be much more inclined to give a wholehearted effort. Indulge in a trip to the spa, get a new outfit for work or make a trip to your favorite restaurant each time you reach a large milestone.

Ensure that your reward is not connected to the habit your are trying to stop. If, for instance, you are trying to quit smoking, it would make no sense, and be detrimental to reward yourself with a cigarette at the end of each week for “being good.”

Save the largest rewards for last. What do you want the most? What is something you have wished you could purchase or experience for a long time? Spend the time you would normally spend indulging in your habit to plan your pot of gold at the end of this rainbow.

And, the reward should be in line with the complexity of your task. Rewarding yourself with a cruise to the Bahamas because you stopped biting your nails would be a bit of a stretch. But, rewarding yourself with a massage at the spa might be more rational.

3. Read about success. Get a book or browse the web to read success stories of those that have previously been where you now find yourself, and were able to conquer the same habit. Being able to see social proof that others have been able to achieve the task you are now facing makes the pursuit seem tremendously more manageable.

4. Baby steps. Focus on only one small step each week to ensure long lasting results. For example, if you are working at losing weight, you might want to eliminate sweets from your diet for the first week. The next week eliminate some of the other carbohydrates, like white bread, in addition to the sweets.

That old childhood adage, “slow and steady win the race” is true. Crash diets will not work, and quitting anything cold turkey will often lead to some other compensatory behavior. This is one reason that most people who are quitting smoking gain weight. They have the need to fix an oral fixation. And if the compensatory habit is just as much of an issue as the one that you are trying to break, then this will grind your progress to a halt and you will have to start all over again at step one.

Have measurable goals. What does that mean? If you are trying to minimize your spending, determine the average amount you spend each week in unnecessary purchases, like your daily latte fix, for example. Then set a goal to reduce that amount by 10% for the first week.

Habits provide you with a level of comfort that everything in your world is okay. They serve to give you a feeling of control over your circumstances. However, a dependency on a routine that has negative consequences or is detrimental to your physical and mental health can be replaced by choices that will fuel your success instead.

Remember that you are the boss of your mind, body, and soul. Embark on the road to breaking up with your bad habit today and prove to yourself just how much stronger you are than it is!

Thoughts?

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How to get more stuff done

finish line

Besides the noble art of getting things done,

there is the noble art of leaving things undone.

The wisdom of life consists in the elimination of

non-essentials.

Lin Yutang

Have you ever found yourself wishing that there were more hours in your day? People’s lives are so filled up with work, family, and appointments that they often can’t seem to fit in everything that is “needs” to accomplish into a 24-hour day. But what if you could accomplish more stuff in less time? If this were actually possible, it would allow you more time with those you care the most about and more time to focus on yourself, as well. The good news is that there are some simple strategies you can use to make the most of every day.

1. Make a list. Write out everything that you think you need to accomplish, and then joyfully cross off each task as you complete it. As you see your list start dwindling, this will provide some additional motivation to help you get the rest of the list done, too.

Put your list wherever works best for you- on the refrigerator, in your daily planner, or on the computer. Keep it somewhere handy so that you can look at it often and stay focused.

2. Prioritize ruthlessly. Determine which tasks are most important and which can probably wait until later on in the day, week, month, or year. If this is something that you struggle with, you can try to squeezing in some of the tasks that can actually be put on hold for a future time. But you must be careful here. To make this work, you must make deadlines for your tasks. For instance, if your in-laws are coming to visit you, then cleaning the guest bathroom would take some priority over re-organizing the basement. Unless of course you are planning on hiding from the during the visit in it.

3. Side-step procrastinating. Far too many people put things off to the last possible moment. When this happens, you find yourself frantically rushing around to accomplish everything, but you end up doing a crappy job and get you get yourself all worked up for no, or intelligent, good reason. There really is a better way!

Know yourself. Know your peak working and creative times of day. Use your morning hours wisely and get tasks started early in the day. This increases the chances that you will finish them in one day rather than dragging them into a second day because you ran out of time to get things done properly. For some people, this may mean that you have to wake up an hour or two earlier instead of sleeping in an hour or two later.

4. Get the unpleasant stuff done first. A great time management tip is to get the things that you dislike the most out of the way first. If you keep putting these things off, you will make a valiant attempt to squeeze it in somewhere else, and you will end up feeling overwhelmed, or short of time.

Always schedule something fun after you finish your to-do list. This will increase your motivation to complete the list quicker.

5. Group your tasks, if possible. If you are capable of accomplishing two things at once, then by all means do it. If you can, for example, put dinner on the stove while making a doctor’s appointment or wait for a load of laundry to finish while you mend a pair of pants, you can cut your time in half.

But be forewarned. Most people cannot multi-task well! Do not make the mistake of sacrificing the quality of the tasks you are trying to perform for the sake of a few extra minutes. If you burn dinner because you were looking at the calendar to make an appointment, this only wastes more of your time in the long run.

There will always be days when it seems as though you just don’t have enough of the precious gift of time. Thankfully, you can do something to improve your work flow so that you are able to accomplish more in any given day. Improving these skills will help reduce your stress level and give you more time to do the things that make you happy, leading to a more peaceful and fulfilling life.

Thoughts?

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Musings + Affirmations: I am passionate about my goals.

Stop living within the confines of how others define you!

You weren’t created to live their life;

you were created to live yours

– so LIVE it!

You can reignite that fire within and bring the passion back

into your goals, dreams, ambitions,

careers, and relationships

by reclaiming control of your own life.

Be unapologetically YOU!

Steve Maraboli

Affirmation: I am passionate about my goals.

My passion drives me forward to live the life of my dreams. I know what I want in life and I set specific goals to get me there. I know that each goal I achieve brings me into closer union with what I desire. I feel truly invigorated with each success!

Meeting a goal, no matter how large or small, strengthens my confidence and self-esteem. I enjoy these feelings and strive to receive them as often as possible.

Setting and achieving goals is part of the cycle of positivity that fuels my passion even more. My passion encourages me to persevere and overcome obstacles and it is replenished and increased with each goal I complete.

My passion enables my success. I use tools to ignite and refuel my passion on a daily basis, even when I face challenges that try to smother it.

My tools include affirmations to transform negative thoughts into positive ones, meditation to relax and rejuvenate my energy, and notes and pictures to inspire and remind me of my goals.

Today, I choose to feel inspired by my passions and let the excitement propel me forward to achieve each of my goals, regardless of any challenges that may arise.

Homework/ Self-Reflective Questions/ Journal Prompts:

1. Am I passionate about my goals?

2. Where can I find additional inspiration?

3. What task can I achieve today to fuel my passion and get me back on track toward my goals?

Thoughts?

Have an awesome week!!!

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Know your value…

Einstein

What you seek in terms of your successes in life should be determined within your own mind and heart. It is very hard to hold onto the feeling of celebration and success for something that is defined for you by someone else, conceived in the mind of another, or determined only by societal standards. Yes, it is nice to have a thriving business, make a lot of money, have a lot of friends and followers, etc. All of those are good things to aspire to. But what happens when the business that you have busted your butt to build no longer makes you feel alive and vibrant? What happens when the massive number of important and well-connected “friends” you have accumulated make you feel all the more isolated or alone.

As you must define your own vision of success, you must also know your own worth and value. Your worth should never be determined by someone else, or solely defined by your connection to someone or something else, like your significant other, or even your job. You must make the time to get to know yourself well- who you are, where you are going and what you bring to any situation. Your worth is as you see it, and not the assessment of someone else’s evaluation of it. Not happy with what you see in yourself? Do something about it!

When you value yourself, you can love yourself, warts and all. Not in a conceited way, but in a way that is vitally important to your well being, sanity and integrity. When you know your value, you can bring value to your own life and to the lives of others.

~ martina

What is Neuro Linguistic Programming (NLP)?

nlp

We are what we repeatedly do.

Excellence, then, is not an act,

but a habit.

Aristotle

A few weeks ago, we did a short post on “EI,” which stands for emotional intelligence. Today we will take on another set of commonly used abbreviations. In a world that seems consumed with abbreviations, many of which are only fully understood by industry ”insiders,” it is hard to keep up; but we try. One of the more popular ones that you have probably seen floating around lately, and should become more familiar with is “NLP.” This stands for Neuro Linguistic Programming. Today, we will try to take a step back and sort out some of the basics for you. To discuss a thing, you must first be able to define it.

What is NLP?

NLP, or Neuro Linguistic Programming, is an incredibly useful behavioral science that can help you change your life. Developed in the 1970s, it combines techniques from neurology, computer science, and linguistics to help people achieve their potential.

NLP has been described as the science of excellence in humans and involves modeling the language structure and behavior of successful people. Put simply, if you want to be a happy, successful person, you cannot go wrong by thinking, talking, and behaving the way happy, successful people do. And if you can learn to utilize NLP in your speaking, you will be able to persuade and convince others with greater success, too!

The Basics

There are many variations of NLP, so there will likely always be debate between the practitioners that some are doing it all wrong. Even with these hotbed of debates, the basic principles are the same, and all can agree that it works to make your life more fulfilling.

The two biggest principles of NLP are that the map is not the territory, and that both life and mind are systemic processes. What does that mean? Glad you asked. Let’s take a quick look at them.

1. The map is not the territory. This means that, as people, we have no way to actually completely understand reality. Instead, we understand and act upon our perceptions of that reality, and those perceptions may be flawed. We use our senses to create a map of what we believe is there. These maps are what determine our behavior, not the reality itself. If your map is skewed, you’ll behave in ways that are skewed, too.

2. Life and mind are systemic processes. This means that the things going on inside your mind and body, and between you and your environment, cannot truly be isolated from one another. Trying to do so will not result in success.

Every NLP technique you encounter is based on these two principles. These NLP techniques can help you understand how your brain works, how you store information, and how to change your behaviors to ones that are more desirable.

The Benefits

1. Career. NLP can help you become more effective in your career. It can help you build up your skills in teamwork, personal development, coaching, leadership, sales, and productivity. No matter what it is, if there is some potential for growth and human interaction is present, NLP can help you.

2. Goal-getting. You can use NLP to help you set and achieve goals, as long as those goals are intelligent, measurable, meaningful and achievable. For example, no program can guarantee you that you can earn three million dollars in a month unless you already have some logical means to draw this kind of income. But, this method could be something you can use to successfully strengthen your skills and interactions with others. It can help you change the way you think and speak, and motivate you to take appropriate actions to achieve your goals.

3. Mental Health. NLP can help you with some of your mental or emotional disorders and phobias. NLP can help bring you a happier and more fulfilling life.

If you are interested in learning how to make a change in your life, NLP just might be the tool that you have been searching for. Quite simply, NLP involves studying successful people and the steps they take to achieve such success. Overcoming phobias, learning how to speak with confidence in front of large groups, and learning how to have a loving personal relationship are all issues that can be helped with NLP techniques. Investigate your options with NLP; you may be pleasantly surprised by the difference it can make in your life!

Thoughts?

More specific information can be found at a friend’s blog- “Let Me Move You…”

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Finding and developing your strengths

strength

We gain strength, and courage, and confidence by each experience

in which we really stop to look fear in the face…

we must do that which we think we cannot.

Eleanor Roosevelt

Each person is born with a unique set of talents and strengths, but whether you have discovered and actively developed them or not is the real question of the day! Perhaps you have been told that you are really good at something, but you have let your skills go untapped while you wait for the confidence and courage to take the appropriate action.

There are even a few people whose self-esteem is so low that they truly believe they don’t possess any talents at all! If this is you, believe that your talents are there, just waiting to be revealed to you!

1. Do your homework

Maybe you think that you are particularly strong in one area, but you aren’t completely sure about it. This first step is where you need to look into things that interest you or that you believe you might be good at. See what resources are available and what it would take for you to make the commitment to strengthen your strengths.

2. Be patient

Developing your strengths to their fullest potential will not happen overnight. To fully develop a talent, you must be patient with yourself. Patience is not easy and many of people struggle with it. But if you can be patient, you will reap the benefits at the end of the process.

A useful way to think of developing your talents is to consider it as a journey. It may take you a while to get to your destination, but you will learn so much along the way. You will make some mistakes and celebrate your milestones, and by the time you are completely done, your strength will be fully developed to the peak of your abilities.

3. Goal-setting

People are more successful when they set specific goals for themselves. Write down what you would like to accomplish and the date by which you’d like to achieve it. Always remember to be realistic and review your goals frequently to keep yourself on track.

Post your goals in places where you’ll see them throughout the day. The refrigerator, bathroom mirror, and your computer monitor are a few ideas. This will not only keep you on track, but it will also motivate you to reach these goals as quickly as possible. I have a vision/ dream board as well as several other places around the house where I can see reminders of where it is I want to get.

4. Believe in you.

Confidence can be one of your greatest strengths and assets. While you are trying to improve yourself in any capacity, if you truly believe that you will be able to accomplish the thing, then you have won half the battle. And this is a battle within your mind, and can be greater than any challenge you face in reality.

You will face some have tough days while you are still feeling unsure of your final goal. But if you can get yourself back on track quickly, you will only stand to build more momentum. Finding and developing your strengths may be seem like an impossible, daunting or overwhelming journey at times. And, yes, it will take some work, but everything worth anything involves hard work!

Stay focused on the big picture, be sure that you maintain unwavering belief that you can accomplish anything you set your mind to, and success, in your terms, will be yours.

Thoughts?

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Book Review: Stop Sabotaging Your Life, by @BrunoLoGreco

bruno 2 15780986

Self-sabotage is when we say we want something and then

go about making sure it doesn’t happen.

Alyce P. Cornyn-Selby

Bruno LoGreco is a Life Coach. He and I are Twitter-mates, who have not had the opportunity to meet in “real life,” yet. When I heard about his book, Stop Sabotaging Your Life, and knowing that it fits in so well with what we discuss here most days, I asked him if I could do a review. He has written several others books about life coaching as well.

In this book, Bruno has actually put together 3 books in one in this deceptively small tome. The first is a story of his youth and eventually rising to meet life’s challenges. The second is a workbook on discovering and rebuilding core values, with a little Psych 101 thrown in so that you can see the connections. The third is an important work-flow for how to maintain your focus once you have gotten yourself back on the appropriate track.

There are hundreds, if not thousands, of self-help books on the market. Sadly, many of these books only get a few of their pages read, and end up only helping the author… financially. Although, that is certainly not the goal. This book is different.

Bruno pulls us into this book using himself as an example who sounds like a lot of people. A “non-go-getter” and possibly a “serial quitter,” and takes us on a journey of transformation to regaining his power, while laying tracks to clearly show how you can regain yours. He doesn’t promise the usual fluff of “I made it, so follow my lead, and you can too.” Instead he offers practical tools, and step-by-step instructions so that you can help yourself!

Tri-Commitment to Success

He guides us through his “Tri-Commitment to Success” program. What are the three things you are committing to? Self-awareness, rebuilding values and goals. The first step in this new paradigm of commitment in shifting to a different life is self-awareness. How? He explains how to meditate, breathe and journal (write). Then he breaks Erickson’s stages of developmental maturation down into manageable chunks that we can use as adults to continue to mature and grow- change your beliefs, break your bad habits, get free of the mindset of always competing and comparing. Any of these things sound familiar?

Then an actual worksheet with values already laid out for you, so that you can concentrate on figuring out what is truly important to you. And the last leg is setting your goals and reaching your fullest potential. Find your passion and your driver, savor the “aha” moments, celebrate your successes, find yourself and your heart in your purpose.

And the best, I think, is in the last two sections of his book. Here he gives you do-able actions to keep you on your path once you have found it, with daily touchstones- getting rid of your negative self-talk, managing your stress, avoiding the pitfalls of procrastination and rumination. Once you find that path or the right track, you have useful tools to help you stay on it.

And finally, this is no soft sell to get you to buy more stuff. He says, “… the best reward you can give a successful life coach is a pink slip…” And he offers tools to show you how to help yourself.

Bruno has found his life purpose, and offers a simple way to help you find yours. It is an invaluable gift you can give to yourself.

life_coach_bruno_logreco_side

Photo credit: http://is.gd/WnW3AH

Contact: https://twitter.com/brunologreco

Get some sizzle! Yes, you!

sizzle

We cannot expect to grow if we are too afraid or unwilling

to change and face challenges.

When we exit our everyday, mundane lifestyles to do

something different we can experience growth,

undiscovered strength,

and new abilities within ourselves.

Ashley Ormon

So, you are feeling like you are stuck in a rut. Are you are bored with your life and with going through the same routine day after day? Of course you feel like you should be happier. There is an exciting world out there with a lot to offer. Deep down inside you know that you want to get out there and take a big bite of life. Sure, it may seem a bit overwhelming, and even scary at times, but you don’t want to stay still as you let your life just pass you by.

It is time to begin live your dreams, take a leap of faith, and get out of your comfort zone! But where and how do you get started?

1. What do you want to do? Set your fears aside for a moment and step outside of your comfort zone. If you could do anything at all without fear, money, or time being an issue, what would you choose?

Make a list of everything you would like to accomplish someday. It doesn’t matter how crazy or outrageous you may think it is, just write it down. It also does not matter if your list has three or thirty-seven things listed. Just search your heart and your mind and write down what you would really like to do.

2. Keep the faith! It is important to have and hold on to your faith in yourself to see your journey through to the end. But this may be one of the hardest qualities to develop. Remember how you are feeling being stuck where you are with little excitement and an unknown purpose. You know things can be better than they are for you right now, but how?

Believe in yourself. You know that countless people before you have lived their dreams, so why not you? What makes them so different? There really is no difference between you and others, except for the belief in the possibility for great success.

3. Share your dream. If you are ashamed of how you are feeling, you should not be. Many people find themselves in this same predicament. The only thing that should embarrass you is if you intentionally decide to stay in your rut! Do yourself a big favor and open up to someone you truly trust.

Whether that’s a parent, spouse, or best friend, tell them that you are ready to make a change in your life and they will be able support you throughout your journey. They can help encourage you on the good days and cry with you on the bad days. And. most importantly, they will be there to support you throughout it all. It’s just what you need to achieve great success!

4. Start!!! Take the first step. It is time, if not well past time for you to take that first leap of faith. As much as you want to step outside of your the box and get out of this rut, nothing will happen without taking that first big step.

No matter how frightening it may seem, you need to focus on the bigger picture. Gird up your loins! Muster up all the encouragement and support that you can find and just do it. Once the first step is accomplished, each subsequent step is a bit easier!

You deserve to be the best that you can possibly be, and deep down inside you know this. You will be so glad you took action, and you will be so very proud of yourself when you celebrate at the finish line!

No one enjoys being in a rut and just going through the motions of life. Don’t let your fears keep you boxed in and bottled up. After all, this is a wonderful world that you deserve to enjoy your life to the fullest! Go out and experience everything life has to offer you. Take that first leap of faith and you will never look back again!

Thoughts?

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Affirmation: The Definition of Success

Questions to Ask Yourself:

1. What areas have I defined as successful?

2. How does my success make me feel?

3. How have I celebrated my success?

Defining Success:

Your success is unique to you, and you are the only one who can characterize it accurately.

We can all appreciate the successes of the people around us. We can learn from each of them and enjoy their achievements.

We can also learn to appreciate own own successes, even if it is not the exactly the same as everyone else’s.

Your success is determined and defined by you. This is what matters most. Once you know your definition, you can determine if you are making progress.

It is of little consequence what other people think about the progress you are making on your journey, because the momentum that is built up is on your terms.

Everyone has a slightly different set of ideas about what success means to them, but you have your own mind to create the goals which are valuable and unique to you.

Today, let go of worrying about what others think and embrace your goals with passion.

Your success is perfect for you!

Be proud of your progress and celebrate each success, large or small.

Focus on your own progress and celebrate each success on my journey.

When you begin to focus and celebrate accordingly, you will feel a new sense of satisfaction in knowing that you can surpass any goal that you have set for myself, and that has value and priority for you.