7 Life-skill lessons to teach your children

 

 Children will not remember you for the material things

you provided

but for the feeling that you cherished them. 

Richard L. Evans

 

Although your children can learn to read and write at school, there are many important and beneficial life skills that schools are not equipped to provide. These are skills that all adults and children should have. Struggling through life can usually be linked back to the lack of expertise or training in one of these areas.

Teaching your children these skills will benefit them throughout their lives:

 1. Asking questions. If you are unable to figure out something that is important to you, you can save yourself a lot of grief by asking questions of the appropriate person. You can also learn a lot by exploring and asking yourself questions.

2. The ability to solve problems. Life is full of challenges. Challenges like, figuring out how to be successful in school, navigating through a new job, making the basketball team. These are all common challenges we must solve. Life is less intimidating when you learn processes that help you conquer challenges, whatever they may be.

If you are in a parental role or a role model, avoid the temptation to solve your all of your children’s challenges for them. Let them strive to figure solutions out on their own.

3. Finding a passion. No one ever trained you to go out and find the things that really excite and motivate you. Most people seem to have been taught that working and having a job sucks, so you better buck up and get used to it. But it really doesn’t have to be that way!

Everyone should have some thing that they are passionate about and enough sense of independence and self-worth to go after it.

4. Independence. Children need to be nurtured, and should become more and more independent as they grow up. Many adults need to learn to be more independent as well. Strive to increase your child’s independence a little bit at a time. You are their most important role model, their safety net. Let them explore while they are still tethered to you. Some of the most valuable and vivid lessons in life come from personal experience.

5. Being content when alone. Many adults, as well as children are incapable of spending even 15 minutes without the attention of others. As children grow up, they learn to attach to other things to find contentment. For many people, buying silly things, the Internet, food, video games, and almost anything can become problems addictions if they are used to avoid being alone.

There is a great power in being able to amuse, entertain and be at peace with yourself. It makes life easier, with fewer temptations have the potential to be destructive or addictive.

6. Compassion. The ability to work well with others and control your own anger is directly tied to your ability to be compassionate toward others. Work at being more compassionate in your everyday life and teach your children the same. Being compassionate is one of the greatest gifts you can give to yourself and your children.

7. Dealing with change. Change is one of the few constants in life. Those who can be flexible enough to deal with change effectively are much more successful and happier in the long-run than those who cannot. Help your child to learn to deal with change and you will be doing them a huge favor. If this continues to be an issue for you or you are looking for ideas about how to explain it, see 8 Amazingly simple ways to get through change.

 

Schools teach us many important lessons, but they can’t and  don’t teach us everything. The things we have talked about today are your responsibility, not the school’s. So, check yourself and your child for the presence of these skills. Your lives will be much better for it.

 

Thoughts?

 

photo credit: http://www.flickr.com/photos/gscsnj/7882614208/sizes/z/in/photostream/

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About Martina

Servant, MD (gynecologist), blogger, writer, life strategist and fulfillment coach, seminary student, mother, grandmother, sexual assault survivor's advocate, minister, speaker, leader, occasional haikuist

9 Responses to “7 Life-skill lessons to teach your children”

  1. Scott Moore November 28, 2012 at 7:14 pm #

    Excellent article and some of the best advice for helping kids develop I have ever heard. I enjoy your blog posts.

    Thanks
    Scott Moore

    • Martina November 29, 2012 at 6:54 pm #

      Thank you Scott. Prety straight-forward if we remember that we are the most important role-models they have.

      Martina

  2. Lori Gosselin November 29, 2012 at 7:47 pm #

    This is great Martina! Just #2 alone – learning to solve problems is huge! Schools can’t teach these things because by the time children arrive in school, so many things are already “set” for them. I used games to teach my children so many things when they were small.
    Lori

    • Martina November 29, 2012 at 8:53 pm #

      Thanks Lori. You are correct. By the time most of us get to school, a lot has been ingrained. Additionally, it is not the purpose of school to take the place of parental responsibility. My children and I also used games to talk about how to deal with and get through many of life’s issues and problems.

      Thanks for taking the time to comment.

      Martina

  3. DjRelAt7 December 1, 2012 at 2:47 pm #

    This is a great list! I am taking notes as the kids are not here yet but I agree with everything on this list! I sometimes wonder if as parents we forget that they learn everything as they go and if they do not come across it they it is a skill never learned.

    • Martina December 1, 2012 at 3:31 pm #

      Thanks Dj. I agree. These are not skills that we just need to teach our offspring, but we should check ourselves to see where we stand with them. It is never too late to do some self-work.
      Martina

  4. Martina December 8, 2012 at 12:01 pm #

    Thanks Margie for the inclusion and the compliment.

    Awesome curation! You have given me quite a few posts that I need to catch up on and people I need to discover.

    Martina

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